The darkness in Hell may mimic the lights being turned off, but today it. Is. ON.
As if you mortals needed any more reasons to visit Hell, we now host well known DJ’s! On lovely eternal evening, it was lights, music, and action, as DJ Pauly D of Jersey Shore lore (and fame) spun tunes that made the minions dance for hours. Indeed, surrounded by a stage of LED screens that reflected each song as he blasted hand mixed tunes out into the evening skies, DJ Pauly D delighted the ears of the minions in ways that haven’t happened in centuries. Whilst you mere mortals were milling about your mundane existence, the fires of Hell were burning hotter than ever! So much so, that two students of Damnation University (Dam U) held a dance off while surrounded by their fellow under-minions. We can’t say what the winner received as it is too horrible for your mortal minds to comprehend. As if that weren’t enough, Chef Action Bronson came and served up spicy cuisine, which the minions scarfed down using their pokers. Why all of this fanfare, you may ask? Well, in it’s due time and rightfully so, we’ve been recognized to the point of having an official drink! If you must know, while said drink will produce fire breathing antics when consumed in Hell, it pretty much has no such affect in the Land of the Living. However, you can purchase your very own can of Mountain Dew Flamin’ Hot in most earthly stores if you wish to try it out for yourself. That being said, we’re not responsible for any adverse affects if consumed irresponsibly. After all, if you want to visit Hell that badly, just drive on over, but for the love of Mayor Odum Plenty, don’t off yourself!
Pic Credit: Twitter @DJPaulyD